Update on all my work.

Okay so here's what's been happening.

I had been producing videos that i wasn't happy with, just plain old didn't work for me at all.
however, it's been that way for everything with me and i realise that it's not my work i don't like but myself and my lack of faith. I found that i am a people pleaser, but apparently i don't count as people to me.
So I was shown a site that uses text and sound only. I like it (will blog about the artist after this) and it inspired me to pull myself up and do something, something that is mine, something that i can relate to.

so in context to my current feeling and mood of myself and my work i wrote down various things i could work with.

• People Pleaser
• I'm only human
• Fuck You
• Fat Bitch
• Small town, small minds, small dicks 
• I'm not even kidding
• CRY CRY
• I get sad sometimes
• The past never goes away
• It never feels any less
• BAD BAD
• Good enough agian

These are just things that i wrote down one day, and i think if i work with text interesting ways, playing with text alignment and rearranging sentences i write, that i can keep myself interested in what i am doing.

The first one that i wanted to work with was "people pleaser" as it was what i'm tackling in my life.

I like the first three i made and got somewhat bored by the forth video, however, i enjoy the colour i used in it as i don't use colour often in my work.


This is  what i wrote the other day in my visual diary on the train after the making of these videos:

I'm finding that my practice has been very stilted this term. i am very happy with my 2-D work, however, i found it hard to get back into making. i think this is due to my lack of confidence in both myself and my practice. i never thought that questions of identity would bother me, as i have always known who i am and what i do. Nonetheless, this has happened and over this term i have had to try and find myself again. it has helped me to think of myself and my practice in terms of 'conceptual art'. with my research into both conceptual and text artists i have managed to regain my feet and create video art again; a medium that i enjoy and like the results of. i'm glad that i had this period of loss now, in my first year, so i can recognise my pattern and how i can overcome it in the future.  


This i think is an important refection to document, as i think it was a light bulb moment for me to look at myself rather than my art for 'why' i am unhappy with the results of my work. I have to trust myself and my judgement over others and take my mistakes in my stride, otherwise i will never be happy and never grow into who i can and want to be-a successful artist in MY eyes. I also now realise that i should be creating, not because someone told me to or for a good mark, but for myself as i should be the most important thing in my life and practice and people that don't support me are not important and will only hold me back. 
I hope this has given a good insight into my scattered mind and explains my art and why i haven't been on blogger in a while, one ranting post is enough for me thank you :) 

Kazimir Malevich

Malevich is one of the first artists to push the idea of what is a painting and the significance of it to the limits. Malevich has influenced artists in ways that we can still see today ( artists such as Mel Ramsden and Jenny Watson) and continues to come up as one of the main topics in the discussion of conceptual and post modern art today. 

without this break through by Malevich i would most likely not be on the path of art today in questioning what makes art, well art. In Black Square Malevich started a conversation that artists can still engage in today, is it the content in the work that matters rather than the technique in which it is made or the other way around?

Refrences:
Drutt, M (2003) Kazimir Malevich; Suprematism. Guggenheim Museum: New York

Joseph Kosuth

I've started to look at conceptual artists that question what art is an what objects are. the top of this list starts with Joseph Kosuth. Kosuth is an American conceptual artist who in his work tackles issues of what is worth more, a photo of an object, the object or the definition of  the object?

he also address the importance of text in the world and how people respond to it. he has done this by using neon lights and simple text.

i think this is a very witty approach to the issue of what art is, if the concept is more important than the physical object, and if people should view these differently.


References:
Verzotti, Giorgio (28/02/2011). "Joseph Kosuth". Artforum international , 49 (6), p. 245.

new vid

this was first attempt at working with static text and sound. i like how it has come out and think it'll be affective on a screen or wall with full surround sound or something. the text is taken form a Imants Tillers quote i found
"Like a garden that is never finished, the work of an artist is forever in the process of becoming"
this made total sense to me in both an artistic sense and a personal one too, as i feel at the moment i am forever in the flux of change, of becoming something other than what i am at present or past. this is why i decided to use this text as my first text piece.

update

i have scrapped that idea for words on the wall.

after talking with my tutor, i realise that i have lost my direction this semester. i lack confidence in my work and myself and have let this stop me from what i love doing. so i've decided to not put the blame on things that i can't control or other people.
things can only affect you if you let them, unfortunately so far, i have let them.
but now I have a sense of where i can take myself and my practice, as i work conceptually and at the moment with text so no idea is to great or small, all it has to be is interesting.
i want to stop restricting myself and ask in my art why i feel i have to.
i think i can pull myself back up before the end of semester and be proud of my work.
i will submit more soon.
oh that's also another point, i will be here more often, i neglect this space where i should really be posting here when ever i question myself or have something i would like to explore/ have found in my practice.

Next Step

I have set myself these guidelines for my next peice:
it has to be
-text
-Playful
-not significant

based on Tuttle's small work i came up with the idea of making comments.
to do this i will write on pieces of tape and place them around the gallery, they will have witty comments on art, life or just silly jokes on them. this way i fulfill the guidelines i have set myself and also have a conceptually sound work that i am happy with.

Richard Tuttle

Tuttle is amazing in how he has taken the media of drawing to new and interesting heights. the fact that he makes and places small objects he has crafted in unexpected ways, to make the viewer actually look and think about what they're looking at. i like this questioning and challenging of 'normal' art conventions and how viewers look and respond to it.

reference:
Anonymous (31/03/2007). "Richard Tuttle". School arts , 106 (7), p. 14.